GI Joe Classified Series Retro Beach Head Figure Review

Discovering the GI Joe Classified Series line has been a blessing and a curse. A blessing because it's rekindled my love for GI Joe in ways even the 3.75-inch line didn't get to do, and a curse because my god as if I needed another line to collect. :/

The Classified Series line boasted of giving us versions of GI Joe characters updated and redesigned for the modern "cool" aesthetic. As much as I loved what they've done so far, it's when they announced a Retro line of Classified figures that really got my engine going.

Because unlike the modern-looking Classifieds, Retro figures are a return to their vintage toy and cartoon looks, which is exactly what I was looking for in the line. So, when they announced that they're releasing a figure of my favorite Joe in the Retro line, the choice was made for me. So, join me as I review the new GI Joe Classified Series Retro Beach Head figure!

I love, love, love the way they package the Retro figures in the classic black card! Brings me back to my days of teaming up with my sister's Rainbow Brite and Polly Pockets in epic battles. It's a shame that I'm a loose collector, because these are the kinds of packaging that hurts my heart to open.

But open it I did, and I'm glad the GI Joe Classified Series team pulled all the stops to bring Beach Head to life in the Retro line. From the vest with iconic ammo mags to his gorgeous green and brown ensemble, this is undeniably the balaclava-wearing drill instructor we've come to know and love.

Is it an upgrade from the previous Classified Beach Head? It depends on whether design or nostalgia is more important to you. The modernized Beach Head is still a good figure in its own right, even if the Nerf guns pull you out of the immersion. But Retro Beach Head looks and feels a lot closer to the GI Joe I know. 

Retro Beach Head is surprisingly limber even with all the accoutrements strapped to him, so you can get some mileage out of his articulation. His leg straps are attached to his belt, so hip and leg movement is a tad hindered. I know it took some wrangling to get Beach Head here to do a kneeling position. What will the boys back at base think?!

The biggest selling point of the Classified Series line is the accessories, of which Retro Beach Head has a shitload. Practically everything his 1986 figure had is in here and then some. Talk about a loadout -- Beach Head here is spoiled for options on how to take care of Cobra pests!

First up is Beach Head's signature Demro XF-7 submachine gun cast in olive green plastic. It's a bit gummy so be prepared to get it warped out of the packaging! Despite that gummy mishap, it's got plenty of nicely sculpted details and features not just a removable magazine, but also a removable suppressor! Perfect for covert missions Beach Head inevitably finds himself in.

Next is a nondescript pistol with extended magazine. Like his rifle, this pistol also features a gnarly looking suppressor that's literally as long as the gun it's attached to. Woe to the poor Cobra sap who finds themselves on the business end of this gun! Both pistol and attachment can be stored in Beach Head's leg holster. 

Beach Head also comes with a crossbow for when silent takedowns are mandatory. It's the same weapon his earlier Classified Series figure had but this time in olive green and, just like that one, is a bitch to put into his hands. It's better stored in his backpack, where it won't encroach on Scarlett's schtick.

Speaking of backpack, Retro Beach Head's is the same as his previous Classified counterpart. I had a hard time pegging the damn thing into the hole on his back, but I guess I'm just thankful it's not falling off his back instead. I still don't know if that's a warhead strapped to the bag, but it's a great visual.

As if that's not enough, Retro Beach Head also carries a black ammo pouch! What's inside it? Are they the same missiles as the one strapped to his backpack? Are they thermal flasks? (war is thirsty work) Whipped cream canisters? We'll never know!

Moving on to smaller, easily lost accessories, there's a couple of grenades and knives in Beach Head's arsenal. The grenades are little black plastic things that apparently have nowhere to store on Beach Head's person. Not like the knives, which look positively sharp and are sheathed in nice little holsters on his leg and thigh.

The awesome moment is when you put Beach Head beside his fellow Retro figures. It's like the cartoon come to life on your desk or cabinet display! It would look even better with some Cobra mooks to fight, but that's future-me's problem.

Right now, I'm just happy Retro Beach Head is a great figure with amazing accessories and a look that brings me back to the good old days of playing with toys as a kid. The GI Joe Classified Series Retro line has been doing a really good job of giving fans iconic-looking figures of fan-favorite characters, and I'm excited for what's in store down the line. I mean, did you see that upcoming Cobra Commander?

I hope you found this review helpful. Stay safe out there and collect wisely! Thanks for reading!

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